I like going to Wal Mart.
Where else can you pick up a new outfit, toilet paper, and browse the five dollar dvd bin all in a matter of minutes?
I keep looking through the mammoth pile of movies, hoping to add Ishtar to my collection. As I cruise the aisles, looking at the piles of winter wear that everyone passed over for 6 months, wondering why the only sizes left are extra small, I usually forget what I came in the store for in the first place.
No problem.
I’ll just pick up some note paper and pens so I can write a list next time. Wow, that really big electric griddle is on sale. Just think of all the pancakes I could make at one time on that baby! At this point I wonder if I should have gotten a cart. I balance the notebooks (Yes, they were 3 for $5) and assorted pens on top of the large box with the griddle, I work my way to the back of the store, grabbing a new spatula to flip the pancakes with, and see the aisles of computer software.
What a brilliant idea!
With the right software, I could put my shopping list on my computer, and print it out before my weekly visit to this magical empire. That photo editing software looks like something I could use too. After all that work, I’ll need to relax, so a new game wouldn’t hurt. I drop some of the boxes as I try to reorganize, and continue on my way, hopefully to the checkout, as my arm is getting tired from the weight of the super griddle. I have to maneuver around the stack of HP computers, reading the box as I go. Three times the hard drive and much faster. Good price too. I scan the electronics department for some one in a blue vest, and smile and nod at him. He wanders over, seeing my arms full and asks if I need something. He assures me that someone could meet me up front with the computer and even help load it into my van.
We strike a deal and I happily walk up to the check outs. After proudly telling the cashier that a wondrous computer is on its way up front especially for me, I once again overspend on my trip here, but feel triumphant that I have the ultimate tool to make my life run smoothly.
I walk past the greeter/security people at the door, with another blue vested employee following behind pushing my PC on a cart. He helps load it into my vehicle, and I thank him, wondering if I am supposed to tip in this situation. He is gone before I can decide and I climb into my van.
I adjust the mirror so I can see around the huge expensive computer in the back and catch a glimpse of two day old stubble on my face. I frown, remembering that I came here for razors, and only razors. I get out of the van, head back into the store, repeating “razors” over and over in my head, quickly make the purchase and head home for the most expensive shave in my life.
Where else can you pick up a new outfit, toilet paper, and browse the five dollar dvd bin all in a matter of minutes?
I keep looking through the mammoth pile of movies, hoping to add Ishtar to my collection. As I cruise the aisles, looking at the piles of winter wear that everyone passed over for 6 months, wondering why the only sizes left are extra small, I usually forget what I came in the store for in the first place.
No problem.
I’ll just pick up some note paper and pens so I can write a list next time. Wow, that really big electric griddle is on sale. Just think of all the pancakes I could make at one time on that baby! At this point I wonder if I should have gotten a cart. I balance the notebooks (Yes, they were 3 for $5) and assorted pens on top of the large box with the griddle, I work my way to the back of the store, grabbing a new spatula to flip the pancakes with, and see the aisles of computer software.
What a brilliant idea!
With the right software, I could put my shopping list on my computer, and print it out before my weekly visit to this magical empire. That photo editing software looks like something I could use too. After all that work, I’ll need to relax, so a new game wouldn’t hurt. I drop some of the boxes as I try to reorganize, and continue on my way, hopefully to the checkout, as my arm is getting tired from the weight of the super griddle. I have to maneuver around the stack of HP computers, reading the box as I go. Three times the hard drive and much faster. Good price too. I scan the electronics department for some one in a blue vest, and smile and nod at him. He wanders over, seeing my arms full and asks if I need something. He assures me that someone could meet me up front with the computer and even help load it into my van.
We strike a deal and I happily walk up to the check outs. After proudly telling the cashier that a wondrous computer is on its way up front especially for me, I once again overspend on my trip here, but feel triumphant that I have the ultimate tool to make my life run smoothly.
I walk past the greeter/security people at the door, with another blue vested employee following behind pushing my PC on a cart. He helps load it into my vehicle, and I thank him, wondering if I am supposed to tip in this situation. He is gone before I can decide and I climb into my van.
I adjust the mirror so I can see around the huge expensive computer in the back and catch a glimpse of two day old stubble on my face. I frown, remembering that I came here for razors, and only razors. I get out of the van, head back into the store, repeating “razors” over and over in my head, quickly make the purchase and head home for the most expensive shave in my life.
1 comment:
Hey, Scott!
I think we've been in separate Wal-Marts; together! Amusing tale...btdt.
If one "goes to Wal-Mart" and only returns home with what was on his/her list; that person has not been "shopping!" (jmo)
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