I have been shaving since I was old enough to grow whiskers. Over the years, I have done like most men, and changed what I use to shave with.
I started out with an old electric that belonged to my grandfather. It worked well enough, but soon I had to improve. I got a newer version that worked fine, but as I got older, I decided to try regular razors and shaving cream.
Ah, how refreshing to been cleanly shaven in the morning. Just a few knicks, but nothing I couldn't handle. I was using a single blade modern razor, since they were far superior to the old style razors used a generation before.
Soon, a "New and Improved" version of my razor was introduced. TWIN blades. Hallelujah! What great timing. The new blade comes out just as I am noticing that mine don't work quite as well anymore. They dull quickly, leaving a few more cuts on my face.
I start shaving with the double edge miracle, and am happy to find that they do much better. Sure, they are more expensive, but worth it.
After a couple years, I notice that these too dull quickly. Good thing that there is a new razor coming out soon. "Super Double Edge....with a lubricant to make shaving smoother" More expensive.....but they are worth it. Coincidence? At the time I thought so.
Soon the cycle is in full swing, continuing to this very day. Triple Edge....Super Triple.... Super Duper Duper Triple.....sigh
Everytime a new one comes out, the one I am using just doesn't seem to be of the same quality anymore. I hear the same comment from my brother, that he can only use the "newest" razor, because the other ones just don't do the same anymore.
I suspect something. The conspiracy is out! The razor companies are deliberatly changing quality in order to get me, the consumer, to spend more money on their products!
I want action! Lawsuits.......protests......no wait.... I have a better idea. Rather than demand restitution, I will something smarter. I am calling up a stockbroker and putting my money into Gillette and Schick.
Pretty clever way of handling a conspiracy, don't you think?
